Monday, October 9, 2023

Simply Amy: Day 3 (Part 8)

     ***The following is a fictitious account of a woman named Amy Jamison who struggles with Separation Anxiety Disorder. Some content may be triggering. If you are easily triggered, do not keep reading. If you are not easily triggered, then hopefully you find this story to be a tremendous blessing***




I am really enjoying reading the Gospel of John! I cannot seem to put it down because I want to know more about this Jesus guy. He really seems quite remarkable! Did he really turn water into wine as it says in the second chapter? I am not sure how that is possible, but it is really cool. Then, right after that, he drove out people from the temple with a whip! That seems harsh, but ok. I do not understand what He means by saying we must be born again. I feel Nicodemus when he questioned Jesus about that because I was confused too. How can one be born a second time? That seems really strange. I really love how Jesus talked to the Samaritan woman at the well. She had five husbands and instead of condemning her, he showed her love and compassion. That is so unlike Hank. I wish I could find a man like this Jesus. Are there any men like him? Jesus seems too good to be true. He is pretty remarkable. 

I walk out of my room into the Day Room because I want to ask the nurses something. As I approach the nurse's station, Jessica yells something at me, but I ignore her. I am focused on what I need to do. The nurse named Rebecca looks up at me and smiles. I asked her if there was a hospital chaplain I could see. She quickly tells me yes and says that she can request he see me today. I feel a sense of relief about this. I really need to ask him a serious question. I decide to go back to my room until he comes to see me. I guess I will continue reading the Gospel of John. If only Hank could see me now. He probably would be surprised because we both never read the Bible nor have we ever stepped foot inside a church before. I wonder what he would think if he saw me reading this Bible. Would he even care? Probably not. I decided to push away all thoughts of Hank far from my mind. I want to know more about Jesus Christ. 

About half an hour later, a man dressed in khaki pants and a polo shirt steps into my room. He introduces himself as Chaplain Dan. I greet him and tell him that it is nice to meet him. He seems very friendly, just like Mr. Romero. 

"How can I be of service to you?" He asks me right away with a huge smile on his face. I tell him that I have been reading the Gospel of John for the first time and I am confused about some things and I need them cleared up. He then said that he could do his best to help me understand. I really appreciate that. 

"Well, for one, how is it possible for this man Jesus to perform miracles that no one else could perform?" I ask him and he immediately brightens up. He explains to me how according to John chapter one, Jesus is God in the flesh, and as God, he can perform all kinds of miracles because He is the Almighty Creator. 

"Actually," He continues, "God performed the biggest miracle when He caused the Big Bang. So, if God could do that, then creating water into wine is not a big task for Him". I find that answer feasible. If Jesus truly is God, then miracles should not be difficult for Him. I then decided to ask Chaplain Dan about the Samaritan woman at the well. I wanted to know how Jesus knew that she had five husbands, but I already suspected that I knew the answer. 

"As God in the flesh, Jesus is omniscient, which means He is all-knowing," He says, then continues, "What is truly remarkable about that story is the compassion Jesus shows this foreign woman because back then Jews did not associate with Samaritans," I tell him that yes, I do find that very remarkable. I jokingly tell him that I wish I could find a man like Jesus and he chuckles to himself. 

"Now, I just have one more question," I say and he looks at me intently. I pause for a second so I can think of how I want to ask this next question. 

"In John chapter 3, Jesus says that to enter heaven, one must be born again. What does that mean?"  I ask him and he seems to get pretty excited about this question. He explains to me that I must humble myself before God and acknowledge I am a sinner who is guilty before Him. Then, I need to ask for His forgiveness and trust in Jesus' sacrifice on the cross for my salvation. This seems all too heavy. Am I a sinner? I think to myself about Mr. Romero's Good Person Test and how he revealed to me that I am a liar, blasphemer, adulterer, and murderer at heart, whatever that means. I guess I haven't really lived a good life and I remember Mr. Romero asked me if God were to judge me based off of those standards where would I go. I know full well that I'd wind up in hell. I really do not want to go there either. If this Jesus guy is for real, then I want Him in my life so He can save me from what I've become. I tell Chaplain Dan that I am ready to come to Jesus but I feel I need to clean up my life before I do because I've made such a mess out of it. He smiles at me. 

"We all have made a mess out of our lives, Amy. As a matter of fact, according to Romans 3:23, we all have sinned and fallen short of the glory of God. You do not need to 'clean up your life' before coming to Him. He wants you to come to Him as you are, but with a humble and contrite heart" He tells me and I tell Him that I am ready to do that. I tell Him that I believe in Jesus Christ. He gets very excited to hear this and asks if he could hug me. I tell him that he can and we embrace one another for about two minutes. Afterward, he asked me when I was being discharged. 

"Tomorrow morning the doctor says I can discharge," I tell him, and he pulls out a small index card and hands it to me. It says Redeemer Presbyterian Church and it even has an address on it too. He tells me that he would love to see me at church this Sunday and I promise him I will be there. Fortunately, it is not too far from where I live. We exchange our goodbyes and he leaves my room. While I am alone in my quiet room, I get on my knees and begin crying out to God. I ask Him for forgiveness for making Hank into my god and for cutting myself and anything else that I can think of. I beg Him for forgiveness. I ask Him to make me born again like Jesus said I need to be to enter Heaven. Afterward, I did not feel any different, except for the fact that it felt like a huge burden was lifted off of my shoulders. For the first time in my life, I am not feeling anxious right now. It is almost like I feel a sense of peace. Like the same peace, I saw in Mr. Romero and in Chaplain Dan. I lay down on my bed and close my eyes and within seconds I am drifting off to sleep. For the first time in my life, I am sleeping peacefully.

***STAY TUNED FOR PART 9 OF THIS SERIES*** 

-David Lee Chu Sarchet
Christian Mental Health Advocate

Check out the Christ-Centered Mental Health Ministry Website







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